Westbound And Down, Bell Tower Chapel to Ferguson Unit While Planning Holiday Get Togethers…

Monday I drove my niece, Stephaney to her pretrial hearing in Weatherford. I was booked at Parker County Jail for three weddings on the same day and hoped that court wouldn’t drag on for more than three hours. 

Cindy met me at the courthouse and as we both sat outside the courtroom, we worried about how we could get through the holidays this year without the drama and chaos Stephaney brought to Thanksgiving and Christmas last year. 

It’s a heavy cloud of uncertainty as to how my niece, Stephaney will act from one day to the next for my sister and I. Stephaney is the one person in our family that continues to be an ongoing problem for Cindy and I. 

Cindy and I are working on convincing Steph that she isn’t getting any younger and it’s high time she starts making something of herself and more importantly her choices in men.

My niece is beautiful and funny when she wants to be but, she must realize that she’s effectively wasted 15 years of her life on the wrong men as well as the wrong choices. 

Stephaney always goes for the “bad boys.” The guys with no real job or home and most of the time, no car. We now have her back on her Bipolar medication that not only helps keep her stabilized but more importantly, stable and sober. Stephaney was incredibly close to my son UNTIL he married his Stephanie. The jealousy between our Stephaney and Stephanie Hafele confuses me. 

Stephanie is possessive of my son and I don’t understand why. Isolating him from two families he’s spent his entire life with is a mistake. Growing up, when I was at work my son was with Cindy and while Cindy was at work, Leigh Ann and Stephaney were with Robbie and I at our house. All of our children were basically raised as siblings. Trying to force my daughter in law to accept that blood is thicker than water is an ongoing battle. 

For Thanksgiving this year, I had planned to pick up my niece, Stephaney and take her to the movies but, my daughter in law started a colossal argument about seeing my niece on a holiday? This phone call was so upsetting to me that I suggested my son and his wife not bother coming to my home for Thanksgiving this year unless they could control their animosity regarding Stephaney. 

Every year has been a battle with my son and his wife or Stephaney “stirring the chili.” To make matters worse, after I had hung up on my son and his wife and their idea that my niece be cut entirely from our family, they both called my twin sister, Cindy screaming at her about spending time with her own daughter on a holiday. I don’t ask permission from my husband to do anything and I’m certainly not going to ask my son or his wife for permission to see my niece nor is my sister. 

As usual, this Thanksgiving wasn’t drama free and although the phone calls were upsetting to Cindy and I, we shook it off and went to pick up Stephaney anyway. 

My son views both Cindy and I as his “two mothers” because we have raised all three of our adult children and grandchildren as a team. This actually isn’t unusual for twins. 

Twins are normally close and spend far more time with their sibling and their children or grandchildren. Twin families are “tight knit.” 

My son called me about moving to Las Vegas. This didn’t go over well. The last time my son and his wife moved to Arizona, it took 6 months for him to admit they were struggling and wanted to return to Fort Worth. 

I quickly reminded Robbie of Arizona while his wife, Stephanie continued to try and convince me that it was a good idea. It isn’t. My son works for his father at Mr G’s as well as my husband at McBee Homes and for me at Texas Twins Events and The Pawning Planners. Where would they work? Stephanie said “I can transfer with Sea Quest.” Where she works as a mermaid part time? How are they going to pay their bills?

Cindy sent me a text regarding this move to Las Vegas knowing that I would be as upset as she was. My son has one friend in Vegas and no family. This move is a bad idea but, I’m waiting until they come by for Thanksgiving to give my full list of reasons as to why I don’t support this move. 

For some reason that I may never understand, my daughter in law is always determined to move my son away from his family and the stability that he has in Fort Worth.

Stephanie can get loud when she wants her way and I’m prepared for another argument with her about this. Stephanie has also continued to move her friends and family into my son’s home since they were married years ago. 

My son can be a pushover when it comes to his wife. For years I’ve watched Stephanie turn their home into a flop house with her Deadbeat relatives and friends and for years, my sister and I have argued that with only my son working that Stephanie was burying him in a ditch that he would one day sink into. 

Stephanie doesn’t pay their bills because my son works 24/7 trying to keep up with their expenses. My son idolizes a wife that in his eyes can do no wrong. While Robbie pulls the wagon, Stephanie sits comfortably inside it. Love is sacrifice but, it shouldn’t be one sided. 

I’m not going to sugar coat this but, loving my daughter in law is dang near impossible. She doesn’t get along with either of my nieces and rarely with my twin or I. 

Since my son’s marriage, his relationship with our entire family has suffered and it’s all due to his wife. My husband can tolerate my daughter in law for a few hours but, that’s his limit. My son and his wife lived with us a few years ago after their house burned down. 

After 60 days of dealing with my daughter in law in our home, my husband said “it’s them or me. I can’t live with Stephanie throwing laundry at you and laying around like a Queen. She has no respect for you, me or our home. You can tell them or I will that it’s time to find somewhere else to live because Hotel Wortham is closing the doors.” Your son is welcome to stay but, I can’t deal with his wife anymore. 

It was a difficult and painful discussion for me with my son about moving out of our home but, I had initially put a limit on their stay with us when I originally agreed to it. 

My son has a completely different “east going” personality when he isn’t with his wife but, seeing him alone is so rare for me these days that I actually cherish the time I do get to spend with him. 

Having your adult children move home again isn’t easy on parents. Having an entitled daughter in law move in with you? Impossible. 

One morning while living in my home, my daughter in law had dumped 8-10 loads of laundry in front of my washroom while I was walking my dog, Foxy. 

Coming home to that mess, I asked what was going on? “Our clothes were smoke damaged in the fire and I need you to do all of the laundry for me.” 

What? I worked, kept my home, cleaned the meals and picked up after her for nearly two months and now she expected me to do all of the laundry they owned? Wasn’t it enough that I was providing a washer and dryer along with laundry detergent and fabric softener? 

Lit, I advised my daughter in law to do it herself since she certainly wasn’t helping clean up after herself and making my housekeeping far more difficult. 

The dirty dishes she left in my sink, the towels on the guest bath floor, the smoking in the house, I could go on and on. I don’t allow smoking in my home but, Stephanie didn’t like my rules. 

The dumping of loads of laundry was actually the last straw. While standing there looking at it, I went nuts. Stephanie had also flipped over an ashtray filled with cigs and advised me “you are going to need a vacuum to clean up the living room because I spilled an ash tray.” Oh, the ashtray that doesn’t belong in the house. 

Everything fell on me from the coffee to the cleaning to the meals to picking up after everyone. I have no idea how my son finds anything. On the numerous occasions I’ve visited my son’s home, it was such a mess that I started cleaning it. My son was raised in a home where everything had its place. There weren’t any dirty dishes or unmade beds. I run a tight ship and my son is well aware of this. 

I’m OCD and keep an immaculate home but with my daughter in law living in it, I was drowning in housework. Expecting me to do her laundry was actually it for me after the “ashtray update.” 

My son attempted to make excuses for his wife by telling me that Stephanie “doesn’t like cleaning or cooking.” Hmmm, well I didn’t like her living in my house and making a mess either but, no good deed goes unpunished. I became a maid in my own home. 

My daughter in law is a shopaholic who once told me a few years ago, “I’m considering throwing all of our clothes away because washing and folding is too much work.” 
Alarmed, I had asked “what my son was going to wear to work?” Stephanie was immature enough to suggest that I buy them new clothes. “What would happen when the new clothes got dirty?” I asked. 

Her answer? “We just keep throwing them away and getting new ones.” My daughter in law and I go around and around and if her grandmother hadn’t spoiled her, Reality or maturity might have occurred sooner but, my son and Stephanie’s grandmother have built a pedestal so high for Stephanie that my daughter in law is as far from “living in the real world” as you might expect. 

My son truly adores his wife although the rest of us sometimes struggle to get along with her. Stephanie loves to travel and for a few years, handled photography for me but, Stephanie drug her feet posting and editing photos. I like to mail out photos to clients within 7-10 days as a courtesy. 

Let me give you an example: Four months ago, Stephanie handled the photography for a wedding in Arkansas. The photos still haven’t been edited or posted. 

To overcome my impatience with my daughter in law on photos, my niece Leigh Ann now handles my photography with Cindy and Stephanie Hafele works with her husband on location. 

This “change” of Leigh Ann or Cindy acting as my photographer has alleviated the many arguments my daughter in law, Stephanie had for two years with me over and over regarding her photography and, my timelines. The irony of my daughter in law and niece having the same name with different spellings isn’t lost on me. Stephanie and Stephaney are both difficult to get along with. 

Cindy and I refer to Stephaney Mahaney as “our Stephaney” in conversations with my son’s wife being called “Robert’s Stephanie.” It’s the only way we can discern which Stephanie we are talking about. 

Both Stephanie and Stephaney are the hardest members of our entire family to reason with if they’ve set their minds on something. They both exhibit argumentive tendencies when challenged. 

I don’t allow political debates in my home because of the many arguments we’ve had between my husband and Stephanie Hafele or Stephaney Mahaney. 

You can’t win an argument- you never will. Just give up and roll your eyes. It’s easier and won’t raise your blood pressure either. 

Having everyone in my home and expecting them to get along for a few hours is similar to playing Russian Roulette. Eventually, one of them will pull the trigger after giving up on playing nice. My family refuse to value the virtues of being close knit to such an extent that a few members actually resent it. 

If someone is looking for Cindy- they call me. Why? Cindy and I are always together. We spend far more time with each other than anyone else in our families that a few relatives are jealous about it. “If Cindy needed something- you’d be there in seconds.” 

Dad is now happy in Waco which certainly eases the stress but, Stephaney has yet to find a job and was given an option of sitting out her fines for 3-6 months or 24 months probation regarding her DWI last February. 

Not surprisingly, Cindy and I knew Stephaney would “opt” to sit out her sentence. The expensive calls from the jail from Stephaney aren’t something either of us are looking forward to. 

Paying for someone to call you from jail complaining about a situation that they put themselves in is the depressing reality that my twin and I have faced for years with her daughter, Stephaney. 

Cindy and I often resent jail phone calls from Stephaney that disrupt our lives and run up our expenses but, how do you tell someone not to call? It’s a tricky situation. 

On one hand, prisoners feel entitled to call family. On the other hand, families are forced to pay hundreds of dollars a month in phone bills for the “privledge” of speaking to their loved one who is can be angry or depressed or even agitated because they are in jail or Prison. 

Jail and Prison phone calls are a lucrative business. How lucrative? For one family alone to talk to their relative it can run up to hundreds a month based on the number of times and frequency of calls.

God Bless my TDCJ Clients for their passion and perseverance because I realize all too well the struggle to afford inmate phone calls. 

Stephaney never considers the expense her daily phone calls put on Cindy and I. When Stephaney isn’t calling me, she’s calling Cindy. 

My niece, Stephaney has been in jail so many times the past 15 years that Cindy and I realize how much more expensive these calls have become through the years. 

Even if you are trying to add money to a phone account, there is yet another fee. It’s a real racket. There aren’t any refunds when the inmate is released either. You forfeit any money you’ve added to the account. Unless of course the person goes to jail again and you can somehow reinstate the original account again. 

Stephaney’s attorney suggested her obtaining an Occupational Drivers License. My sister and I were unaware these “liscebses for folks who have lost the privledge of driving even existed BUT, Stephaney will NOT be driving OUR cars. Stephaney lost her car. 

OUR CARS and OUR INSURANCE? Our husbands would go crazy. I nearly suggested that Stephaney’s attorney let her drive HIS CAR but, bit my tongue instead. 

Stephaney had apparently led her attorney to believe that her license suspension was impeding her ability to find work and alluding that her mother or I would allow her to “borrow” our cars which couldn’t be further from the truth. 

Cindy and I buy bus passes for Stephaney and public transportation is the ONLY option she has now. I worried about Cindy getting into an argument driving Stephaney back to the Group Home in Fort Worth while I ran to my appointments before meeting Stephaney’s sister, Leigh Ann at my home aka WorthamWorld for her Skype interview with Michael Yorba and WFN1 News about her photography for my clients at Texas Twins Events and The Pawning Planners. 

I frequently checked in with Cindy via text and phone calls once I was back in Fort Worth with Leigh Ann to stay advised of her anxiety with Stephaney and the ongoing argument of “seeing her kids for the holidays.” Having someone in your car hellbent on getting their way is difficult and stressful. 

To keep Leigh Ann’s daughter, Maddy entertained, I decided to load her into a stroller and walked her to a park near my home. 

Maddy can be a handful and has taken to throwing things lately. Maddy was throwing small rocks on the playground which was why I decided to have Leigh Ann meet us at the park after her interview. I didn’t want Maddy upsetting other children. 

Cindy was on her way to meet us at my home  so, Maddy, Leigh Ann and I were walking back through my alley. I wanted to check and see if the cement had cured behind my garage so we skipped the sidewalk running down Byers Ave and walked the alley. 

The plumbers had apparently covered the sewer clean out valves. I called my husband about this as we’ve had a few too many plumbing issues. I was right about this being a problem. 

Covering up those valves will require tearing up the driveway. My husband sighed heavily about having to call the cement guys back but, better now than when the plumbing problems return again. 

Here’s a photo of the smooth drive with the covered holes that any plumber knows need to have access. If you live in a house and don’t know where these are located, you need to find out. They are really important to homeowners.  Being married to a developer and home builder, I’ve learned a lot of things about construction that I never realized. The plumbing is an ongoing issue at WorthamWorld though so, I was familiar with the clean out.

I was also looking at the numerous chunks of broken cement and thinking “what a mess” and not paying any attention while walking through the breezeway between our house and the neighbors with Maddy until Maddy suddenly decided to pick one up of the cement stones and threw it over her shoulder as a bride would toss a bouquet. 

Incredibly, the cement rock hit me right in the middle of my mouth. Leigh Ann didn’t notice as she continued to walk to the front door with Maddy. 

As Leigh Ann turned to look at my bloody face, Leigh Ann asked “what happened?!” My horror of not knowing if my teeth had been knocked out had me turning my iPhone around for a bloody selfie. My face was throbbing and blood running out of my nose. What a mess. 

Cindy was the first to see receive my bloody selfie text and asked if I had already contacted our family dentist, Dr Cheng? It was decided that Cindy would meet me there at Dr Cheng’s after Cindy dropped off Stephaney at the Group Home. 

Leigh Ann was so upset about this unexpected accident that she couldn’t stop crying. I told her “we must teach Maddy to stop throwing things. She throws balls at Foxy’s nose, a ravioli can at Cindy’s head and toys, boots or other items at the twins. 

I’ve never had a child hit me in the face by throwing something at me like this before and I realize it wasn’t intentional but, it’s your responsibility to teach her that throwing things is wrong. I’m not mad at you or Maddy but, this could have been my eye or something that couldn’t be repaired.”

Cindy had “rolled into” Dr Cheng’s in her SUV and immediately jumped out to inspect my mouth and fat lip. A chipped veneer could be repaired for $4-800 in most circumstances and the issue was solveable. 

My face was killing me. Cindy reminded me of the Halloween photo she had sent years ago after getting veneers that read “Trick or Treat!” I was horrified to see that photo of Cindy and as usual, ran her to Dr Cheng. 

Our dentist, Dr Cheng, is now used to emergency appointments because Cindy and I freak out when a tooth issue is at hand around here. Seriously. Our teeth and our smiles are our trademark with clients. 

A few years ago, my bride had broken her tooth and refused to leave the dressing area at an Arlington Wedding. 

This bride had also written me not ONE but TWO BOUNCED CHECKS. I will forever refer to her as “The Broken Tooth, Bouncing Check Bride.” 

Arriving at the venue with a chip on my shoulder regarding her audacity to write not one but two bad checks to me, I was rushed to the dressing room by the wedding planner. A wedding planner? A venue? A photographer? Had she written THEM hot checks too? 

I was lit as I found the hot check bride crying and refusing to get married. I sent my assistant Ann to my SUV to grab super glue and deal with this unexpected issue. 

There is no EASY BUTTON in my line of work. I’m the planner, the task taker, the problem solver and yet again, I would be the one expected to solve this problem so, I set about giving it a shot with a few tools from my emergency kit of tricks. 

While attempting to repair the bride broken tooth and addressing the bouncing check fees at my bank, I glued my finger to her tooth. This was unexpected to say the least. 

I normally would strongly suggest going to a dentist to bond your teeth as super glue is unforgiving. It took nearly a half hour to cut the skin on my finger away from the brides tooth. 

I later needed stitches on my index finger from this “incident.” Had it not been at a wedding, I would have never attempted to resolve the issue but, it was and I did. A broken tooth is upsetting for ANYONE. 

The hot checks, the fees from my bank and an urgent care bill? Yep. I’ve encountered some fairly unexpected situations. It’s hard to surprise me anymore. People are unpredictable. 

Cindy and I had forgotten that Dr Cheng was closed on Monday and decided to have Leigh Ann meet us at Red Lobster after leaving Dr Cheng’s and although she was still crying and horrified about my busted lip and chipped tooth, I quickly calmed her down and suggested trying to enjoy lunch since Dr Cheng couldn’t see me until Tuesday morning. 

Other diners probably wondered what had happened to my face but, I ordered a vodka tonic to soothe my frazzled nerves and sent my husband a text explaining what had happened and let him know I would still run errands and was okay just a little shook up. 

I love my grandniece, Maddy but, this kid has a helluva arm and she has a good aim too. Perhaps baseball is in her future? Maddy is a handful. 

Maddy is also a model for numerous brands and doesn’t always like having her photo taken either. Her mom, Leigh Ann nearly had to stand on her head to get the perfect photo.Cindy and I have actually suggested not having more children to Leigh Ann and Alex because Maddy has the energy of four kids! 

If Maddy had been twins, I doubt that errands or trips to the store would be “in the cards.” Why? Because 2 Maddy’s would require 2 adults. 

There wouldn’t be any “Target Runs” for Leigh Ann or grocery shopping with Maddy for Cindy. When I have Maddy, I don’t allow her to walk because she will run. I keep her buckled into a stroller or car seat. 

Maddy is fearless and can take off at the snap of your fingers. Teaching her that running away or throwing things at people is a no-no has been a real struggle. Cindy told me that her drive home with Stephaney was stressful because Stephaney has no idea that her twin daughters, Maryssa and Makenna didn’t want to see her “if she wasn’t sober” for the holidays. The twins have seen far too much the past fourteen months. Not knowing what to expect can be upsetting. 

Stephaney often demands to “see her kids.” These demands are guilt trips in most cases and the twins have not only seen their mom behaving erratically the past fourteen months but also, getting detained and involuntary committed over and over again. 

The twins want their mom to get help but, Stephaney doesn’t believe she needs it. The end result? It’s a deal breaker for the twins. They don’t want to see their mother right now because they have no idea what to expect. Who could blame them? 

Cindy and I are “stuck in the middle.” On the one hand, the twins needs come first. On the other hand, their mom continues to accuse us of stealing her children. My sister and I actually love working because it gives us an opportunity to escape the chaos of our own family. 

Stephaney is trying to manipulate the holiday situation by using the “it’s the holidays and I want to see my kids.” 

Well, nearly every holiday, Stephaney has managed to do something to upset either the twins, my son, her sister or our husband’s. Holidays with an addict or Bipolar relative in your family can be HELL. 

My brother in law, Steve was in Canada Monday and looking forward to being home for the holidays. Like my husband, Steve hated conflict. 

Nobody enjoys a good meal like Steve Daniel. Whatever we cook, Steve will love it. Matthew is cooking with me today up until I leave for Bell Tower and loves being in the kitchen. 

Our feisty dog loves the holidays too and is already showing a “holiday weight gain.” 

For my entire adult life, I’ve tried to plan the perfect holiday get together and yet for my entire life, I’ve failed. I can usually control my son or nieces arguments aka “petty jealousies” to a certain extent but with my niece, Stephaney, I lost it last year. 

It takes a lot to make me snap especially in front of my husband and brother in law but, Stephaney wouldn’t stop talking under her breath and complaining about gifts she didn’t buy. 

You get the “picture.” When you spend thousands of dollars trying to make Christmas special, the last thing you need is someone (Stephaney) complaining that an $800 computer YOU BOUGHT THEIR DAUGHTER isn’t good enough- it’s a deal breaker. This went on for two hours too long in my opinion. After all, she was at my home with my gifts and starting arguments after argument as a guest. 

After Thanksgiving and Christmas last year with Stephaney being one fiasco or argument after the next, my husband actually “banned her from our home” a few months ago after she jumped in front of his SUV without recognizing him and he watched video of her trying to break into our home. The erratic behavior of Stephaney has made him fearful for my safety on more than a few occasions over the years. 

Our home is always the central location of get together and while I’m hurt and upset that Stephaney kept pushing my husband by her antics, my role is to keep my husband happy and while I hope one day he will change his mind, we are forced into picking Stephaney up to go to the movies or dinner to celebrate holidays rather than having her at my home. It’s awkward. It’s painful and it’s tragic that my niece can’t come to our home for me. I’m actually quite devastated about the “ban.” My sister is too although no one challenges either of our husbands when they put their foots down because it’s so rare. 

Steve and Matthew rarely get involved in our family drama with Stephaney or any of our kids for that matter. Neither of them have their own children or parents still living. They are peaceful and quiet but, even they have limits. When Steve “lays down the law,” we all listen. When Matthew “makes a rule,” he gets the same results. The “husbands” rarely butt in on family matters with our children and grandchildren. They both realize that Cindy and I are fairly independent and rigid about the children and grandchildren. We are also often enablers. Yes. We are working on our inability to say no and it’s difficult. 

Guilt is the primary reason we don’t give up. Although we have nothing to feel guilty about, we were raised in a family that used it frequently on us as children. 

My grandmother was the guilt trip Queen. A true manipulator. She was one in a million when it came to getting her way and was willing to twist you into a pretzel to get it. 

Our husbands have been through too much with Stephaney and because of the past, don’t hold much hope for the future with Stephaney one day working harder to get along with everyone although I still do. 

I wrote a blog regarding Love, Loss and Learning on my sister site, The Pawning Planners about the current “Stephaney Situation.” 

If you missed it, here’s the link–http://thepawningplanners.com/reverend-wendy-wortham/you-wont-miss-the-eggs-until-the-hens-stop-laying/ I don’t know why Stephaney doesn’t understand that the twins are old enough to know she needs help but, Stephaney won’t seek help unless of course, she is involuntarily committed. 

For a few days now I’ve been emailing my Bell Tower Bride a few different ceremony scripts. Requests for non religious ceremonies by far outweigh the requests for a religious ceremony. 

Although I encourage all of my clients to write vows, it’s not easy to speak publicly which is why many of my clients prefer to follow my lead. 

It’s essential to give clients options on ceremony structure to feel they are involved in the process. I love creative input from clients. Since many others have asked me if it’s possible to change or add elements to components of the ceremony, it’s easy to do. 

Here’s the script we decided on for my holiday wedding: We are gathered here today to celebrate one of life’s greatest moments, the joining of two hearts. 

In this ceremony today we will witness the joining GROOM/BRIDE and GROOM/BRIDE in marriage.

If there is anyone present who has just cause why this couple should not be united….. Sussh!

Who gives this man/woman to be married today (Optional)

Opening Comments

Today we have come together to witness the joining of these two lives. For them, out of the routine of ordinary life, the extraordinary has happened. 

They met each other, fell in love and are finalizing it with their wedding Today.

Romance is fun, but true love is something far more and it is their desire to love each other for life and that is what we are celebrating here today.

A good marriage must be created.

In marriage the “little” things are the big things.

It is never being too old to hold hands.

It is remembering to say, “I love you” at least once a day.

It is never going to sleep angry.

It is standing together and facing the world.

It is speaking words of appreciation, and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.

It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.

It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow.

It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.

It is not only marrying the right person — it is being the right partner

VOWS (face eachother and holdhands)(repeat afterme)

I, GROOM/BRIDE take you GROOM/BRIDE to be my husband/wife, my partner in life and my one true love. I will cherish our friendship and love you today, tomorrow, and forever.

I will trust you and honor you

I will laugh with you and cry with you.

Through the best and the worst,

Through the difficult and the easy.

Whatever may come I will always be there.

As I have given you my hand to hold

So I give you my life to keep

I, GROOM/BRIDE take you GROOM/BRIDE to be my Husband/Wife, my partner in life and my one true love. I will cherish our friendship and love you today, tomorrow, and forever.

I will trust you and honor you

I will laugh with you and cry with you.

Through the best and the worst,

Through the difficult and the easy.

Whatever may come I will always be there.

As I have given you my hand to hold

So I give you my life to keep

Words of Wisdom

GROOM/BRIDE AND GROOM/BRIDE I would ask that you always treat yourself and each other with respect, and remind yourselves often of what brought you together today.

Give the highest priority to the tenderness, gentleness and kindness that your marriage deserves. When frustration and difficulty assail your marriage – as they do to every relationship at one time or another – focus on what still seems right between you, not only the part that seems wrong.

This way, when clouds of trouble hide the sun in your lives and you lose sight of it for a moment, you can remember that the sun is still there. And if each of you will take responsibility for the quality of your life together, it will be marked by abundance and happiness.

I Do’s

GROOM/BRIDE, do you take GROOM/BRIDE to be your Husband/Wife? (“I do”)

Do you promise to love, honor, cherish and protect him/her, forsaking all others and holding only unto him/her forevermore? (“I do”)

GROOM/BRIDE, do you take GROOM/BRIDE to be your Husband/Wife? (“I do”)

Do you promise to love, honor, cherish and protect him/her, forsaking all others and holding only unto him/her forevermore? (“I do”)

Ring Exchange (whohas the rings)(repeat after me)

The ring is a symbol of the unbroken circle of love. Love freely given has no beginning and no end, no giver and no receiver for each is the giver and each is the receiver. May these rings always remind you of the vows you have taken.

I GROOM/BRIDE, take thee, GROOM/BRIDE to be my Husband/Wife- To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, in joy and sorrow, and I promise My love to you. And with this ring, I take you as my Husband/Wife, for as long as we both shall live.

I GROOM/BRIDE, take thee GROOM/BRIDE, to be my Husband/Wife. To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, in joy and sorrow, and I promise My love to you. And with this ring, I take you as my husband/wife, for as long as we both shall live.

Closing Comments

To make your relationship work will take love. This is the core of your marriage and why you are here today.

It will take trust, to know, that in your hearts, you truly want what is best for each other.

It will take dedication, to stay open to one another – and to learn and grow together.

It will take faith, to go forward together, without knowing exactly what the future brings.

And it will take commitment, to hold true to the journey you both have pledged to today.

By the power vested in me I now pronounce you . . . . . .

The Kiss

You may kiss your Groom/Bride.

I would like to introduce the happy couple. 

Every wedding is different. Every client is unique. One “standard ceremony” might work well for one couple while another works better for someone else. 

Please go over ceremony options with me prior to the wedding to ensure that you are pleased with the ceremony. 

Whether you’re wedding is in a backyard, Prison, C-130, Karate Studio, Football Stadium or other unique location, exceeding your expectations is important to not only me but also, my Texas Twins Events Team. 

My Ferguson Unit Bride contacted me today with questions about guests and appropriate attire. 

Yesterday, while grocery shopping, Stephaney called me to see where I was and joined me at Walmart. Picking out a few items to take back to the Group Home, Stephaney was far more stable than Monday. 

My husband is looking forward to a few days off work as a VP of McBee Homes although another builder called this morning to ask one of our builders to shut off a sprinkler. 

Unlike me, Matthew turns off his email to prevent problem customers from upsetting his day when not at work. I on the other hand, take calls, texts and emails from 9AM-9PM seven days a week. 

This morning, my Ferguson Bride sent me at text at 7:30AM which isn’t all that unusual. I have a schedule of returning early calls, texts and emails every morning after feeding my feisty beagle, Foxy and taking him for his morning walk. 

Guests aren’t allowed at Texas Prison Weddings BUT, they can wait outside the Unit and join you at your photo shoot as Trishelle’s friends and family did.Please wear clothing that is conservative to your Texas Prison Wedding. You can change clothes for your photo shoot as many times as you like.

Trishelle (pictured above) wore jeans to her  Michael Unit wedding and two different dresses to her photo shoot. (Photos by Maddie & Me Photography/Texas Twins Events).

If you’d like to bring photos or other items to your photo shoot, we encourage you to do so. 

I pack a traveling photo booth of everything needed but, personal items bring a creative an emotional element to your photos. Change clothes as many times as you like for your photography session.Prison Unit Photos are $3 each in quarters. I will buy at least one photo so it’s not necessary for you to purcase photos.

If you have additional questions, comments or concerns, feel free to contact me through any Wendy Wortham Website or email me directly wendy@texastwinsevents.com there is a special section dedicated to TDCJ Weddings on this site or you can find me on FB by using the tool bar to search Texas Prison Weddings With Wendy Wortham.