Revisiting the Rainbow Lounge Event Unification Ceremony of Richard and William
Yesterday, I came across a misplaced camera containing film from an event Texas Twins Events did for Richard and William at the Rainbow Lounge in Fort Worth, Texas last year.
This would prove to be an emotionally charged and moving ceremony for Richard and William that created a lasting friendship with this Texas Twin and my sister Cindy Daniel.
Our make up artists Tucker Taylor aka Rochelle Roullette and Cory Oropenza aka Siren had been at my home in Westover Hills several hours doing make overs on Cindy Daniel, myself, Ann Alexander and the Tiny Texas Twins Maryssa and Makenna Mahaney
while being filmed for promos on Texas Twins TV. A reality show that our agent Thom Oliphont is pitching based on our adventures at weddings, funerals, baptism, and other events that for some reason often have moments of unexpected hilarity.
After finishing our make up, the photographers/videographers, Sean Perser and Chris Watson as well as the rest of us were starving and decided to stop by Kincaids for a delicious hamburger en route to the Rainbow Lounge where we were to meet Richard and William.
Thankfully, Tom Mc Avoy had granted us permission to film at the Rainbow Lounge and, as usual, the staff was very friendly and helpful.
I chose the Rainbow Lounge because there had been so many documentaries that seemed to put a negative light on the Rainbow by revisiting the Raid over and over. The LBGT community here in Fort Worth will never forget the Raid, nor would I want them to. Rather, my desire was to do a ceremony at no cost to whoever wished to be United in a Commitment Ceremony with flowers , photos, a certificate. The plan would be moving the reputation of a local landmark forward in Fort Worth where I’m a volunteer in numerous community organizations including the Gay Rodeo Association and Community Food Pantry. This is my home, my community and, although I’m happily married, I support life choices of others and operate a gay friendly business, Texas Twins Events.
My idea was to do something positive and change the direction of focusing on the raid and the loss of our family accountant, Tom Anable who died of an apparent suicide after the effects of the raid continued to haunt him. Tom also made many great strides in uniting Fort Worth through city leadership and moving the annual TCGPWA parade away from Jennings Ave to the downtown Fort Worth area to ensure a family friendly environment as well as creating Fairness Fort Worth to bridge gaps between the LBGT community and those opposing alternative lifestyles.
Arriving at the Rainbow Lounge, I was perhaps as nervous as Richard and William. After all, I wanted everything perfect and was hoping that myself and the team would exceed their expectations.
My fantastic Team of Cindy Daniel, Cory Oropenza, and Tucker Taylor quickly set about helping me unload my loaded SUV, and transform the dance floor with flowers, ribbons, and larger arrangements I had made of silk two weeks prior to the event. Ann Alexander took Maryssa and Makenna to McDonalds for treats.
Upon entering the bar, William and Richard were overwhelmed with the decorations and, the ostrich and peacock corsages I made for them. This always thrills me, I take a great deal of pride in exceeding the expectations of others.
The couple had brought their closest friends with them and I went over the details of the ceremony asking if there was a personal element or any changes to the readings they’d like to add such as poetry or handwritten vows. We had chosen a Unity Candle/Hand Blessing Commitment Ceremony and I gave everyone a few minutes to get settled prior to “jumping right in.”
It’s important to me that everyone is settled and comfortable going into any ceremony. Both Richard and William were slightly nervous and I wanted them to have a moment to visit with friends.
These young men were so gracious and thankful for the opportunity to make a public commitment to each other that I hope one day those in opposition of same sex unions will open their hearts and minds to the difficulties and challenges of same sex couples with relation to insurance, right of survivorship, and income tax benefits. Everyday, the Tarrant County Probate Court fields families opposing the surviving parties ability to make burial decisions, being forced out of a shared residence and losing assets to blood relatives of the descendent. It’s a heartbreaking tragedy happening across America, and certainly not expected by the survivor who has faith that the court system will honor the wishes of the deceased.
In the middle of the ceremony, Richard was overcome with emotion. Cindy and I began to cry with him, I’m normally quite controlled during ceremonies. This one however, would touch me in a way that traditional ceremonies hadn’t. Months later I would realize that it wasn’t just the great honor from Richard and William for granting this ceremony. No, I would come to understand that this ceremony was so emotional because a traditional wedding is a “given.” Normally, no one protests the union. Society accepts the union.
For Richard and William, they did not take this ceremony for granted. That was what made the difference, these kind and gentle souls with gregarious smiles will always remind me of the challenges faced by LBGT couples in Texas and are the reason I wrote the blog “Five Legal Documents Every LBGT Couple Needs.”
Thank you Tom Mc Avoy for allowing us to come to the Rainbow, and a thank you Richard and William for contacting me to conduct your ceremony. Your kindness is a gift, your friendship is a blessing.
