“All discarded lovers should be given a second chance, but with somebody else.” Mae West
If I’ve learned anything during this pandemic it’s that life is fragile, unpredictable and filled with joy for “some of my clients” but not all of my clients. A handful of my clients are facing uncertainty, loss and the difficult choice of divorce.
Last night a text from Julie regarding her husband wanting a divorce caught me off guard. I had suggested counseling a few weeks ago and was hoping that it was helping. Her husband had decided not to go. She had sent me a text regarding using me as a reference and I decided to use the opportunity to ask about marriage counseling. My concern for her future as a single parent with mobility issues is profound. Julie has been struggling through physical therapy since her back surgery. I cannot fathom why a husband would divorce a wife who is facing a long road ahead of herself to regain mobility alone.
Burt and Deanna welcomed their adopted daughter three days ago. For them, their joy is immense. They went through so much to finally adopt a baby that their excitement at finally bringing her home cannot be described in words. I will be baptizing the baby when they return to Texas in a few weeks.
My Ferguson couple are going to finally see parole and get married when I travel to Midway February 12th. There have been so many changes since last March. So many people affected by Covid, job loss, wage cuts and uncertainty in what continues to be a time of separation for those who support the new president and those who don’t. Social media has become a hotbed of hotheads who choose to argue with strangers as well as connections while trying to force their agenda on others. Whichever side you are on I’m sure you know what I mean.
Divorce is the death of something that began with promise. A future together. Life partners committed to sharing a path of love. For those who struggle through a divorce, the scars will always remain.
Recovering from the setback of a divorce is never easy especially when children are involved. Nearly twenty some odd years ago, I went through a divorce and custody battle myself over my only child. Wars leave scars. I know the road ahead for Julie as well as two other brides won’t be easy but we pray it won’t be as difficult as mine was. The only supportive member who stood by my decision to divorce was my twin sister. I had no one else. During her divorce, she had no one else. We are very close because we’ve always only had each other during hard times prior to our current husbands. Yes, we both found love and commitment after failed marriages which is why I know there is hope for my clients who may feel right now the future is one of loneliness. You are never to old to find love. I believe this to be true. I also believe that being with the wrong partner will help you appreciate the right partner when they do come along.
As we continue to wait for Abbott to reopen Texas fully and subsequently State, ICE and County Detention Facilities, I’m often at Federal Units during the week so please bear with me if you call or email and don’t get an immediate response as I’m also at TDCJ release facilities marrying couples after release or meeting with traditional clients to plan weekend events. I answer all correspondence between locations as I can.
Cindy like me is concerned about the future for her grandtwins. One is homeschooling while the other is attending school. Maryssa wouldn’t complete assignments so the option to “pretend” to get her work completed at home was taken from her by Cindy. Makenna is and has been completing her work at home while also working. Makenna recently purchased an IPhone 12 Pro which caused a ruckus with her twin who wanted one. Maryssa is a bit of a slacker. She wants it all but prefers to have things handed to her which IS a problem. Teaching Maryssa the merits of sacrifice and hard work to get what you want continues to be an escapade for Cindy and I both. I’m worried about Maryssa at 18 and where she plans to further her education or if she does. Quite frankly I think beautician school would be the best choice for Maryssa who loves fashion and makeup but time will tell. She is going to HAVE to work at some level and support herself. It’s tough with teens. Really rough. If you’ve “been there” yourself you know what I mean.
I saw my son, his wife and my grandson today for lunch between client meetings and the plumber. My grandson will be one year old soon and I haven’t seen nearly as much of him as I would have wanted or hoped for. Covid continues to separate families. My husbands office had yet another Covid outbreak. He’s already a germ freak but Covid has taken his germaphobic tendencies to new heights. I’ve also been and continue to be cautious about large group gatherings.
My niece, Leigh Ann will be flying back to LAX February 9th with her daughter, Maddy. I know the separation of saying goodbye to Maddy again will be hard for Cindy and I both. Maddy is like Oliver a “bright spot” to a very stressful, unpredictable and depressing year for the Texas twins.
My husband and I have decided to build a home in Parker County. It may not be our “forever home” as I said this home would be but there won’t be two flights of stairs either. The basement stairs are a real pain here as are Cindy’s basement stairs.
Saying goodbye to the city in the next 8-13 months as we build will be a bit melancholy for me. I dread moving. I always dread moving. But downsizing yet again is in order. We don’t need 2700 square feet for two people just as we didn’t when we left our previous home of 3200 square feet.
My husband and I both travel and work spending huge amounts of time on the road. A 2100 square foot home is probably plenty of space although deciding what to sell at yet another estate sale prior to moving is a tough call. I love my eccentric home furnishings. But I don’t really need 6 closets of clothes anymore. It’s time to let the size 5-7 and size 8-10 closets full of clothing go. I may never be that size again anyhow.
I’m not sure when I must’ve become a hoarder? It’s incredible to me that I’ve amassed so much “stuff” but I have.
I’m at Parker and Palo Pinto Counties tomorrow and looking forward to meeting clients as I head to see Maddy and try to spend as much time as I can with her before she flies back to California…