Whose Wedding Is This? “The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.” -Alice Walker
Yet again this weekend someone who thinks they have input, power or control regarding a wedding has caused conflict with my client and themselves. Why do weddings bring out the worst in people?
Today’s blog is a heads up for in-laws and out-laws who think they can run the show. Unless you are writing the check, don’t bother running your mouth.
One guest decided to advise my clients that he wouldn’t be attending their event because “cash bars are in bad taste.” Really now? To who? The guest that thinks the hosts are obliged to provide an all you can drink buffet? Who are these idiots that think a wedding is a free bar event and if it isn’t that they won’t attend or attempt to guilt or shame my clients into giving into their demands? I hate open bars at events. HATE THEM. Why? Because someone is going to get drunk and make a fool of themselves while subsequently screwing up my event that’s what’s why.
What? You heard me. I’ve performed over 2500 events and I’ve seen it all kids. Open bars are expensive but beyond the expense of a free flowing booze bonanza are the results of guests becoming out of control at your expense. After all, you are paying for that open bar.
One father “only had $10k” only?! What the? Ten thousand dollars is a lot of money. While the couple wanted a $30k event, they were not paying for it. Couples need a wake up call. Your parents don’t “owe you” an extravagant wedding. If your parents are paying for your wedding, stop wanting more and start saying thank you. Your parents don’t owe your friends an open bar either. If your friends won’t attend your wedding because there isn’t an open bar, they aren’t your friends. They are free loaders.
“I’ve been dreaming of my wedding all my life. I want it perfect.” Have you been saving to afford your wedding all your life? If you haven’t, lower your expectations and learn to budget. If your budget is $5k, don’t expect your parents to spend $20k it’s one day. Do you want your parents in debt for years? Do you know the sacrifices they are making to give you the wedding that they couldn’t afford? Grow up.
Last year, one bride was upset that she couldn’t have everything she wanted due to her parents budget. Not surprisingly, her groom made a run for it realizing that he wasn’t going to be able to afford her.
Reel it in. From wanting steak and lobster to settling for chicken, there is a budget and an effective guideline. Weddings are to celebrate a love story. What they aren’t are an opportunity to one up your friends by having an over the top event…